Family Madness!

Recent family madness in a nutshell: 

The Caveman: 

If I choose to dump out my snack bowl onto the ground for the purpose of entertaining the masses, it will not be refilled.

Woolyworm-style caterpillars make intriguing subjects for observation.  

I fall and scrape my knees when I run on the driveway ignoring the requests to walk coming from those around me.

I enjoy giving my friends a lift in my "jeep jeep".

When I choose to kick people who are helping me to get dressed, they will walk away and refuse to assist. 

Taking a stand against laying oneself down in the bathtub to wash hair will result in water being poured from a receptacle over my head.

Caring for the neighbors' tomato loving dog while they are out of town can be very exciting.

The Dreamer:

Sometimes I fall in love with animals at the pet shop whom I am unable to adopt. 

Allowing people to believe that my magnetic earrings are authentic pierced ears will result in being gifted real earrings I am unable to wear. 

Eating homemade ice cream with chums is incredibly messy and grand.

Starting to pedal a bike by placing a foot on the highest pedal is the secret to getting started.

Longer shoelaces are easier to tie, but increase my susceptibility to trip.

Me:

Sometimes I must pick a course of action out of the sky and give it a go.

Some people are impossible to understand and difficult not to despise. 

Especially when they come in the form of worthless neighbors gifting me used make-up, novelty alcohol bottle key rings, shattered hair claws, dirty purses, stained nap mats, half inflated toy punching bags, ripped clothing and broken kid's meal toys

When my children bicker, argue, and fight it drives me to insanity and I want to run away from home.

The seam ripper retains its permanant position as the "best loved" tool in my sewing repertoire despite futile attempts to "take my time".

Corn is wonderful; it provides an excellent activity (shucking), a suitable last minute dinner choice, and limitless possibilities for corny pun fun. 

My favorite moment of each day is sneaking into the spawns' room before I hit the hay to ensure that they are adequately covered and snuggled into bed. I realize that I love my children most of all when they are asleep.

Mister:

My wife is a crazy woman who is constantly in a manic frenzy and probably responsible for my hypertension. 

When in doubt, go searching for earthworms...